What Happened When I Hit Perimenopause Mid-Career (and My Brain Left the Chat)

I used to be sharp. Sharp enough to answer six emails while chairing a meeting, fix a typo in a project proposal mid-sentence, and still remember to pick up oat milk on the way home. I was the person everyone came to for quick answers. My brain was my superpower—until, quite suddenly, it wasn’t.

I was heading up a major project, mentoring a team, reviewing data, juggling deadlines like a Cirque du Soleil act—and then, without warning, I couldn’t remember why I walked into the kitchen. Or worse into a meeting.

I didn’t feel tired. I felt… scrambled. You know when your computer has 27 tabs open and none of them are responding? That was my brain. And no amount of green juice or motivational podcasts could fix it.

This Isn’t Just Burnout (Although That Was There Too)
At first, I assumed it was burnout. Classic case. Years of working hard, pushing through, proving myself. I thought: “Of course I’m tired—I’ve been running on caffeine and cortisol forever.”

But something was different. It wasn’t just that I was tired—it was that my mind no longer felt like mine. Words I knew intimately began escaping me. Mid-sentence.

I started writing everything down. Sticky notes multiplied like rabbits. I even put a Post-it on my water bottle that said “Drink this”. Spoiler: I didn’t.

Enter: The Perimenopause Plot Twist
I was 45. What I didn’t realise is that I had quietly crossed into perimenopause, that mysterious phase where your hormones go off script and start improvising. Nobody tells you that this transition can hit hardest not in your body, but in your brain.

According to a 2021 study published in Neurology, over 60% of women in midlife report memory issues, brain fog, and difficulty concentrating during perimenopause [1]. The drop in estrogen affects key neurotransmitters like serotonin, dopamine, and acetylcholine.

Which is why one day you’re presenting strategic outcomes with clarity, and the next, you’re googling "Is it normal to start mixing up my kids’ names with the dog’s—or should I be concerned?"

Wired, Tired, and Wide Awake at 3:00AM
Sleep? That became a thing of the past.

I’d fall asleep exhausted, only to snap awake a few hours later—brain racing, heart pounding, and apparently ready to reorganise the pantry or relive that one awkward conversation from 2009.

Cortisol, our stress hormone, peaks earlier in perimenopausal women. Combine that with plummeting estrogen and progesterone, and you’ve got a brain that’s basically hosting a rave at 3am.

Sleep deprivation alone can tank your memory, mood, and decision-making. Add perimenopause on top, and you’ve got a perfect storm—with no “sick day” policy in sight.

Meanwhile, at Work…
Imagine being a scientist or department head known for precision, or an artist who lives off creative flow—and suddenly everything feels… inaccessible.

You’re reading a document you wrote last week and it may as well have been written in Sanskrit. You’re standing in front of a room and completely blank on the project’s key objective (even though you designed the project).

You begin to doubt yourself. Not just your skills, but your core identity. You start working harder to cover it. You hide behind “busy” or “just tired” or “I’m multitasking a lot”—when really, you’re terrified that something deeper is going wrong. And because no one talks about this stuff, you start thinking maybe it is just you.

You’re Not Broken. You’re Evolving.
The turning point for me came in a meeting. I was mid-sentence—speaking confidently, passionately—and then… static. I looked at my colleague and said, “I’ve completely lost my train of thought. Give me a sec.”

Except it didn’t come back. That night I got really scared. I finally admitted to myself: this isn’t burnout, this is something else.

I made an appointment with a GP (one who actually understood women’s health), ran some bloodwork, and there it was: welcome to the perimenopause party—where the theme is “surprise,” and the dress code is “whatever fits today.”

From Breakdown to Biohacking
Once I understood what was going on, I got to work—scientist mode activated.

I began paying attention to  my cycle. I started strength training again. I reduced my caffeine (reluctantly), added magnesium glycinate, focused on omega-3s, and started giving my nervous system the same respect I once gave my inbox.

I built boundaries—real ones. I said no more often. I moved meetings to times when I knew I was mentally sharp. I scheduled rest like it was an urgent appointment. And I stopped feeling guilty for needing it.

So What Do I Want Women (and Employers) to Know?
This isn’t a side issue. This is the issue for many mid-career women.

Brilliant leaders, creatives, and innovators aren’t vanishing from the scene—but many are silently struggling. Not because they’ve lost their drive, but because their hormones have hijacked their bandwidth—and no one ever gave them a manual.

Perimenopause impacts brain function, energy, confidence, and identity. And yet, it remains invisible in most workplaces.

A Harvard Business Review piece in 2023 found that 35% of women aged 45–55 said menopause symptoms impacted their decision to pursue a promotion, and 18% had taken time off because of it—but almost none talked to their managers about it [2].

Why? Because we’re still told to push through, hide the struggle, smile through the fog.

The Future (and My Brain) Looks Different Now
Is the brain fog completely gone? Not every day. But now I know how to manage it. I’ve learned to work with my body instead of gaslighting it.

I wish I’d known sooner that this wasn’t weakness. It was wisdom—forcing its way in, demanding I pay attention. Forcing me to drop the performance and be real.

So, if you’re a high-functioning woman who suddenly can’t remember the word “functioning,” please hear this:

You are not losing it.
You’re not too old.
And you are definitely not alone.

You’re just in transition—and with the right support, this can be one of the most powerful transitions of your life.

 
Sources:
[1] Greendale GA, et al. (2021). Neurology. Cognitive performance and the menopause transition.
[2] Harvard Business Review (2023). The overlooked cost of menopause in the workplace.
[3] Medic G, Wille M, Hemels MEH (2017). Nature and Science of Sleep. Effects of sleep deprivation on cognitive performance.

 
P.S. If your brain has recently left the chat too, DM me. You don’t need to navigate this alone—especially not with a foggy compass and a broken GPS. At VANTA Coaching, we’re rewriting the midlife narrative (and we never forget the snacks).