When Relationships Shift: A Holistic Look at Menopause and Connection

Menopause is so often spoken about as a purely biological event. Hormones fluctuate, periods stop, symptoms arrive, and eventually, the body settles into a new equilibrium. Yet to reduce menopause to this biological narrative alone is to miss the far more profound truth: it is also a relational journey. It changes the way women see themselves, and therefore the way they relate to their partners, their families, their colleagues, their communities, and the wider world. To approach menopause holistically is to understand that this transition doesn’t just happen inside the body—it ripples outward, touching every connection a woman holds.

Research consistently shows that menopause influences not only physical health but also psychological and social wellbeing. A large review published in The Lancet (2022) highlighted that symptoms such as sleep disturbance, mood changes, and hot flushes are directly associated with shifts in relationships and quality of life. In other words, menopause is never just “hormonal”—it is deeply human.

A Woman’s Relationship with Herself
Every relationship begins with the one we hold with ourselves, and during perimenopause and menopause this relationship is often tested in ways it never has been before. The changes in the body are obvious: fluctuating hormones that can leave energy unpredictable, brain fog that can undermine confidence, night sweats and disrupted sleep that erode resilience, weight redistribution that can alter body image.

A study in the Journal of Women & Aging found that self-esteem tends to dip during midlife, largely due to body image concerns and a sense of losing control over health. But the same study also showed that women who embraced lifestyle interventions such as exercise, mindfulness, and social support experienced a stronger sense of self-worth and personal growth. This suggests that menopause can be a time of renewal rather than decline—if women invest in the relationship with themselves.

Romantic and Intimate Relationships
The impact of menopause on intimate partnerships is well documented. Hormonal changes can alter libido, and physical symptoms such as vaginal dryness can make sex uncomfortable. According to the North American Menopause Society (NAMS), around 50% of women report experiencing genitourinary symptoms of menopause that affect sexual function.

But intimacy is not just about physicality. Emotional shifts—irritability, low mood, or fatigue—can create misunderstandings. Partners may feel rejected, while women may feel guilty or frustrated. A survey by The Menopause Charity in the UK found that over 60% of women believed menopause had negatively affected their relationships, but importantly, couples who engaged in open communication reported stronger bonds afterwards.

This demonstrates that menopause, while challenging, can also be a catalyst for rediscovery. Couples willing to learn, listen, and adapt often discover new dimensions of intimacy—emotional closeness, curiosity, and a deeper appreciation for one another’s resilience.

Family Dynamics and Parenting
Menopause often overlaps with the turbulence of teenage years, leading researchers to describe midlife women as part of the “sandwich generation”—caring for children on one side and aging parents on the other. This dual burden can increase stress, with studies in the Journal of Family Issues showing that women in midlife report higher conflict at home compared to men of the same age, often linked to hormonal fluctuations and caregiving demands.

Teenagers may not fully understand the emotional volatility their mothers experience, sometimes interpreting withdrawal or irritability as rejection. Psychologists highlight the importance of “family literacy” around menopause—talking openly so that children and partners understand the biological and emotional context. Families that adopt this approach often experience greater empathy and cohesion.

Friendships and Social Circles
Friendship networks can be both a lifeline and a mirror during menopause. Women who share their experiences within supportive circles report reduced stress and greater wellbeing. A 2019 Australian Longitudinal Study on Women’s Health confirmed that social support is one of the strongest predictors of resilience during menopause.

However, friendships that lack understanding may fade. Many women report becoming more discerning at this stage of life, investing energy only in relationships that feel nourishing. From a holistic perspective, this pruning of social circles is not a loss but a recalibration, aligning with the developmental psychology concept of “socioemotional selectivity theory,” which suggests that as people age, they prioritise emotionally rewarding relationships.

Professional Relationships and the Workplace
The workplace is one of the most overlooked arenas where menopause exerts influence. I touched on this in my previous articles. Cognitive symptoms like brain fog and forgetfulness, alongside physical symptoms such as hot flushes, can erode confidence. A UK survey conducted by the Fawcett Society (2022) found that one in ten women had left their jobs due to menopause symptoms, while many others had reduced their hours or passed on promotions.

This is not just a women’s issue—it’s an economic one. The same report estimated that the UK economy loses millions annually due to untreated or unsupported menopause in the workplace. Forward-thinking companies are beginning to introduce menopause policies, flexible working arrangements, and awareness training for managers. Such measures not only retain talent but also build inclusive cultures where women feel valued at every stage of life.

For individual women, this period is also an opportunity for self-advocacy. By speaking openly about needs and challenging outdated stigmas, women redefine leadership in ways that normalize honesty and humanity in the workplace.

The Role of Supportive Others
The presence—or absence—of support is one of the strongest predictors of how women experience menopause. A systematic review in Maturitas (2018) found that women who had supportive partners, family, and social networks reported significantly fewer psychological symptoms than those who felt isolated. Support does not have to be grand; it can be as simple as listening without judgment, sharing responsibilities at home, or offering empathy rather than dismissal.

This relational web matters. When others understand that menopause is not weakness but transition, they become allies in helping women thrive rather than merely survive.

Reframing Menopause as an Opportunity
The cultural narrative of menopause as decline is outdated. Increasingly, research suggests that many women experience menopause as a turning point toward greater authenticity. Psychologists describe this as a "process of individuation"—where women begin to assert clearer boundaries, rediscover passions, and cultivate deeper self-awareness.

Far from ending connection, menopause can deepen it. Couples who communicate, families who adapt, and workplaces that support create environments where women can flourish. Friendships become more authentic, and self-relationships grow stronger. This reframing is essential: menopause is not simply an ending, but a recalibration of life’s most important bonds.

Summarising, menopause is, in many ways, the great revealer. It brings to the surface not only the changes happening within a woman’s body but also the hidden dynamics of her relationships. It exposes cracks, but it also creates opportunities for repair and renewal. For women willing to meet themselves with compassion, and for those around them willing to respond with empathy, menopause becomes not a period of loss but of growth.

Relationships will shift during perimenopause and menopause—there is no avoiding that. But these shifts do not have to be destructive. With awareness, honesty, and holistic support, they can instead become the very catalyst that allows women and those who love them to step into a deeper, more authentic way of relating. Menopause, far from being the end of connection, can be the beginning of a richer, more grounded way of living in relationship—with ourselves, with others, and with the world around us.